Please Don't Underestimate A SAHM

I remember, once I was a very committed student. Since I was 11 I put a big poster in my room,

TARGET:

UPSR- 4As

PMR - 8As

SPM - 9As

The main reason is because I want to go to study in overseas like my twin brothers did. Then when I achieved my target, economy is downturn and I got a scholarship to MMU. My brother said, it's a blessing in disguise coz I was a naive girl, u'll never know what's gonna happen to me overthere. Anyway, after 1 month in MMU, I got an offer by Renong to study in Australia. But I turn down the offer because I remember during the interview for the scholarship, they asked me to take off my tudung if I want the scholarship. (sabar je kan?)

Then what I knew I took Engineering, and my aim is to achieve a good CGPA so that scholarship tak kena kick and I want to work to get my own financial independence. Then time flies so fast, I got my own career, my own salary, 4 years later I quit and be a SAHM. I didn't quit at the first time (just took unpaid leave) but some people said rugi and sayang lah berhenti kerja..unpaid leave pun rugi coz it might slow down my career progress. But I took just because my husband asked me so (to get keredhaan hubby jugak) and part of me wanted to take care of our son. Then after 2 years, I quit for good. 

Don't get me wrong, but deep down in my heart, terkilan jugak (who doesn't?)...I studied hard last2 jadi domestic engineer...nak apply kerja kat sini hubby tak bagi...he prefers me to be a fulltime mother. The part yang sedih when some people (not all) look down at SAHM. Then some people would also say, Oh, she's lucky because her husband provides for everything...well, provide doesn't mean just money...should provide also counts taking care of the family including cooking, washing, yadda yadda. I know some SAHM also got almost the same story and feeling like me.

Sometimes ago I felt mentally challenged by not doing anything plus I hate to depend on him financially bcoz I used to have my own financial independence...so I took the effort to create my online business from home. At least, it's something rather than my routine everyday housework. Just...just...scary thoughts if anything happen tu of course ada (knock on wood). But hopefully that is when my education and experience in business will come to my rescue.

Sorrylah, entry harini emo skit because of one incidence happen over here. Please bear with me.